'I don't think I grieved, I don't think I thought it was real'

England midfielder Ella Toone said she didn't "actually grieve" aft nan decease of her begetter until a play connected nan sidelines done wounded forced her to get "mentally right".

Nick Toone was diagnosed pinch prostate crab nan time aft nan Lionesses hit Germany to triumph Euro 2022, wherever his girl scored nan opening goal.

He passed distant successful September 2024, 3 days earlier his 60th birthday.

Manchester United's Women's Super League run sewage nether measurement conscionable 2 weeks later and Toone started each convention crippled for them until suffering a calf wounded successful training successful November.

Toone hadn't scored successful six games earlier her wounded and successful her ain words had mislaid her emotion for nan game.

"I had conscionable mislaid my dada earlier nan play started," nan 25-year-old told The Tooney & Russo Show.

"I played connected aft that and astir apt wasn't enjoying it arsenic overmuch arsenic I should person been. I would ne'er person told myself that aliases admitted it because each I ever wanted to do was play shot for him.

"When it really sewage taken retired of my hands it made maine realise, 'right, I do request this, I do request to measurement distant from shot and get myself mentally correct much than anything'. I needed to person that emotion for nan crippled again and miss it."

Toone's clip distant from nan transportation allowed her to physically and mentally attraction connected herself.

She started speaking to a counsellor and spent clip successful Dubai pinch her partner Joe while undergoing rehab.

"At first I didn't miss it," she added. "I was doing my rehab, I was enjoying being successful nan gym and getting stronger. It was nan champion point I could person done to get myself mentally correct and really grieve.

"I don't deliberation I grieved, I don't deliberation I thought that it was real."

After 9 weeks out, Toone was backmost pinch a bang.

She scored six goals successful her first 5 games backmost for United, including a stunning hat-trick against rivals Manchester City.

"When I was backmost connected nan writer and astir nan girls I was for illustration 'I miss it' and that's erstwhile I knew I was fresh to footwear on," Toone said.

"I came backmost and started playing good and scoring goals. Then my emotion for nan crippled really grew and I wasn't putting arsenic overmuch unit connected myself arsenic I was earlier successful wanting to do everything and wanting to people for dad, reasoning I'm ne'er going to people again.

"It was cleanable timing and now it's astir not falling again. It's difficult successful shot because you are up and down each nan clip anyway."

Toone is presently connected world work arsenic England hole to look Portugal and Spain successful nan Nations League.

Her erstwhile United team-mate, champion friend and podcast partner Alessia Russo, who now plays for Arsenal, drove to Manchester erstwhile she heard of Nick's passing.

"From surviving together to past being truthful acold distant down successful London was difficult anyway," Russo said. "When thing arsenic dense arsenic that happens, each I wanted to do was beryllium there.

"Whether she wanted maine location aliases not I didn't really care. I conscionable wanted to beryllium there, to beryllium pinch her, to outcry pinch her, to eat pinch her, to effort and make her laughter and to thief pinch thing she needed.

"It's truthful difficult being distant from personification astatine a clip for illustration that. As soon arsenic I could I wanted to spell and spot her. I cognize Tooney would driblet thing to thief maine if I needed her, large aliases small."

Russo was 1 of a number of Toone's team-mates from some nine and state who rallied astir her successful nan acheronian times.

"Everyone came together," Toone added. "They person been amazing, my team-mates arsenic well, conscionable being normal, not pottering astir maine aliases not knowing what to say.

"When it was nan ceremonial it was unbelievable to spot nan magnitude of group there. I had nan girls coming up from London, I had Georgia [Stanway] flying complete from Germany.

"I had each these group coming and I thought, 'wow, I americium truthful fortunate to person these people' aliases other what would I person done?"

A difficult play connected and disconnected nan transportation for Toone ended pinch an awesome 8 goals and 4 assists.

Each clip she recovered nan backmost of nan net, she pointed to nan entity to observe pinch her dad.

"It's difficult because everyone is sad that time and talks astir memories and it's done past for everyone. But for america it's still truthful hard.

"I've been blessed pinch a batch of bully group astir maine and decidedly couldn't person sewage done it without them. Now I conscionable want to support kicking connected and doing things correct and making him proud."

Season Two of nan Tooney and Russo Show drops connected BBC Sounds and YouTube connected Friday 30 May, pinch caller episodes each Monday and Friday.

See each episodes here.