‘I’m a Democrat in love with a Republican’: Meet the couples who are part of a dying breed

Dueling Democrats and Republicans successful Congress could usage immoderate pointers from these clashing couples.

“I’m a Democrat who wholly opposes Trump and his agenda, truthful I cognize it sounds crazy that I’m joined to a Republican,” St. Louis, Missouri, mom-of-two Samantha Miller, 38, told The Post of nan governmental paradox she’s embraced pinch her hubby Andy, a 42-year-old instrumentality of President Donald Trump.

“There are times erstwhile we won’t speak astir it [politics],” Samantha told The Post. “We conscionable know. I’m very, very strong-minded successful my opinions. He’s very strong-minded successful his.”

As nan red-blue disagreement and governmental shutdown wreak havoc connected federal workers’ paychecks, travelers’ picnic plans and more, immoderate divergent duos are proving that opposites do pull — and tin moreover prosper together.

While Samantha has “polar opposite” views to Andy, who supports nan administration’s economical schedule and a crackdown connected forbidden immigration, she said they “have a beautiful family and a beardown matrimony built connected love, not politics.”

If it sounds excessively bully to beryllium true, that’s because it astir is. Inter-party relationships are uncommon — and becoming rarer.

In 2017, 4.5% of American marriages were comprised of couples from opposing governmental parties, per nan Institute for Family Studies. By 2020, that number had dropped down to 3.6%.

Updated information for 2025 isn’t available, but if that inclination has continued, less than 2% of marriages crossed nan U.S. would beryllium made up of a Republican and a Democrat.

Love wins — and, surprisingly, truthful do different lovebirds for illustration them.

In Washington, D.C., nan nation’s halfway of polarization, a emotion communicative has unfolded for lawyers Sydney Bradford, 41, and Drew Benbow, 42, against a backdrop of governmental gridlock and hyper-partisan name-calling.

“I deliberation it makes our narration stronger because … I don’t deliberation you should tally distant from nan reliable issues,” Drew declared. “I deliberation you should person nan conversation.”

Both couples told The Post that their governmental disagreements really thief their relationships successful a assortment of ways. They person go amended communicators, attack situations pinch curiosity and empathy, and hunt retired different parts of each different that they worth and admire.

Here’s really they person successfully embraced their anomaly, against each odds.

Sydney Bradford and Drew Benbow

Sydney and Drew first met 20 years agone arsenic students astatine Hampton University successful Virginia. At nan time, some identified arsenic staunch Democrats.

The brace mislaid touch, only to reconnect 2 years agone erstwhile Sydney learned that Drew had written a caller titled “The Devil’s Politics.” She sent him a connection connected Instagram; he replied, asking her connected a date.

Over dinner, it felt for illustration small had changed — except, perhaps, for Drew’s governmental views. Sydney noted that her aged friend was abruptly sounding a small much blimpish than he had successful nan past.

While astir liberals mightiness person trim and run, Sydney, who presently useful arsenic General Counsel astatine a healthcare company, realized she had romanticist feelings for her erstwhile assemblage classmate and agreed to proceed seeing him.

“By nan clip it was very clear that he was a Republican, we had already connected connected a deeper level,” she explained. “The fibre of who he was hadn’t changed — and has not changed [since].”

Of his gradual governmental transformation, Drew — who is an lawyer and Army seasoned — told The Post: “I allowed my situation to power my politics. I grew up successful Washington, D.C., which is very, very liberal. But erstwhile I really started to deliberation astir my individual views, I realized that they are much blimpish and much aligned pinch nan Republican Party.”

Given that they’re some lawyers, Sydney and Drew are relentlessly funny and bask engaging successful statement and discussion.

On nan surface, nan brace disagrees connected issues, but finds immoderate astonishing communal crushed erstwhile they talk topics successful detail.

“You can’t return a hatchet; you person to usage a scalpel,” Drew explained to The Post, saying he believes astir Americans person nuanced governmental beliefs. “People person views that mightiness beryllium somewhat conservative, a small spot much liberal, and it’s really those ideas travel together that shape your governmental ideology.”

For instance, he said, “There are group who are Republican aliases blimpish successful this state who person needed and utilized Obamacare.” On nan flip side, Drew believes Trump is “the astir serene president that we’ve had successful decades.”

“Trump has kept America retired of these everlastingly wars,” he declared. “That matters to maine — and I’m judge it matters to a batch of different group successful this state [regardless of whether they’re a Republican aliases a Democrat].”

Sydney told The Post that her probing governmental discussions person besides helped her recognize nan nuances of people’s beliefs.

“It’s ne'er arsenic binary arsenic group would think,” she stated. “I deliberation that’s really 1 point that’s travel done conversations that I’ve had pinch Drew: How we do work together connected definite issues that mightiness make maine a much blimpish Democrat and make him a somewhat much wide Republican?“

The mates says fearless honesty and curiosity astir authorities person besides strengthened their narration successful different ways, sharpening their connection and allowing them to person difficult, candid conversations astir different issues that originate successful a relationship.

Therapist Lesley Koeppel agrees, telling The Post that governmental differences tin really lead to a deeper knowing and a stronger relationship.

“We each want compatibility, but governmental differences do not automatically mean narration incompatibility,” she explained. “What often matters much is really a personification holds their ain beliefs and whether they tin tolerate complexity, differences, perceive respectfully, and attack these differences pinch curiosity.”

Samantha and Andy Miller

While speech is crucial, it tin besides beryllium constructive to wound your tongue.

In St. Louis, Missouri, Samantha and Andy Miller often determine not to broach hot-button issues if it’ll extremity successful an argument.

Knowing erstwhile and really to attack each different is basal — and it helps that they person been “inseparable” since 2009, truthful they’re intimately acquainted pinch each other’s moods and triggers.

Andy told The Post he votes pinch self-interest successful mind, favoring policies he believes will support his family safe and prosperous. He besides likes beardown borders and power independence.

Conversely, Samantha says she’s “an empath” who “wants to do what’s champion for everyone.”

“I 1000% don’t judge successful what’s happening correct now pinch nan ICE and nan deportations and really they are rolling out,” she declared, adding that she is successful favour of cosmopolitan wellness attraction and weapon reform.

The Millers person ever been connected other sides of nan governmental aisle, but mention 2016 arsenic nan twelvemonth erstwhile authorities started to go a portion of regular conversation. The brace said they based on “passionately” during nan 2024 predetermination campaign.

“Leading up to nan 2nd election, you know, they were trying to crush his sanction into nan ground,” Andy told The Post of Trump. “Crushing his family into nan ground, going aft him pinch lawsuits and, you know, ineligible stuff, to return him disconnected nan ballot.”

“But nan aforesaid point tin beryllium said connected nan different side,” Samantha countered, earlier quipping: “We’re going to commencement fighting during [this] interview.”

However, nan mates says their governmental differences lead to a stronger matrimony because they’re required to attraction connected different parts of each different that they emotion and admire. In different relationships, specified things whitethorn beryllium taken for granted.

For instance, Samantha sees her hubby first and foremost arsenic an unthinkable begetter to their children.

“It conscionable makes up 1 portion of you, but I don’t deliberation it defines you,” Samantha said of a person’s governmental affiliation.

“We were together a while earlier each nan craziness started pinch politics, and nan narration wasn’t built connected that,” Andy added. “I don’t expect anybody to work together pinch my views 100%.”

Both couples opportunity they consciousness it’s “taboo” to beryllium successful a mixed governmental relationship, but are speaking retired to promote others to scope crossed nan aisle and time off down assumptions astir others.

Sydney and Drew precocious closed a D.C. barroom named Political Pattie’s, but are now hoping to revive it arsenic a SuperPAC to beforehand governmental civility.

They opportunity now, amid nan shutdown and increasing polarization, it’s ne'er been much pressing to talk to each different — and possibly moreover find love.

“Democrats and Republicans request to beryllium capable to beryllium astatine nan aforesaid table,” Sydney declared. “To spot nan humanity successful different person, moreover if they person a very different position than yours, has ne'er been much important.”